Wednesday, October 10, 2007

Birthing Love

11 years ago today I was sitting in a bathtub in a birthing center in Gainesville, Florida laboring with my beautiful daughter, Raine. There were 14 others in attendance to include her dad, my mom, sister, the neighbors, friends, the newspaper reporter, and photographers. The contractions had actually began the day before but we didn't go to the center until the morning of the 10th.

About 32 hours into the labor I was still stuck in the third stage, even though I was trying different tricks like walking around and sitting on the birthing ball she still wouldn't move any further. That was when her dad, Tai, took me by the shoulders and firmly told me, "we are having this baby now!" I guess he was tired. I agreed and then realized that I had not contemplated or even visualized her being here after the birth. I was actually afraid of having her come out and that was what was keeping her in.

I loved being pregnant. I savoured every moment of it. I loved my big belly and feeling her move inside me. But for some strange reason I had never contemplated the actual baby in my life part of this process of having a baby and it quite frankly scared me.

After Tai's insistence something clicked and she was off and running - well I wish, it still took another four hours of pushing (they don't show you that in the movies). She came out in the water into her daddy's hands and he placed her on my chest. She didn't cry. She just looked up at me with these enormous, peaceful eyes and I cried.
I created this!!

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